Accomplished Goal
About two and half years ago I was having lunch with a good friend, and I confided in her that I was afraid. At that moment in time my life was just about as perfect as it could be. All of my needs were met, but more than that… all of the things that I had dreamed of were a reality as well. I’m not just talking about material goods… I really mean EVERYTHING. Mentally, physically and spiritually… I could not ask for more. I was exactly where I wanted to be, doing exactly what I wanted to do. My fear was that it was all too good. Everyone has a cross to bear, and at that moment in time, I couldn’t see mine. Suffering is a part of life… and I wasn’t doing any. I knew it was around the corner and I dreaded it terribly. I didn’t want to miss a moment in dread of the future and she suggested that I start counting my blessings.
There is a Mormon hymn that still rolls through my memory
When upon life’s billows you are tempest-tossed, When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost, Count your many blessings; name them one by one, And it will surprise you what the Lord has done.
[Chorus]
Count your blessings;
Name them one by one.
Count your blessings;
See what God hath done.
Count your blessings;
Name them one by one.
Count your many blessings;
See what God hath done.
Are you ever burdened with a load of care? Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear? Count your many blessings; ev’ry doubt will fly, And you will be singing as the days go by.
When you look at others with their lands and gold, Think that Christ has promised you his wealth untold. Count your many blessings; money cannot buy. Your reward in heaven nor your home on high.
So amid the conflict, whether great or small, Do not be discouraged; God is over all. Count your many blessings; angels will attend, Help and comfort give you to your journey’s end.
No truer words were ever spoken. 2009 has been full of burden, doubts and conflict for me and counting my blessings is what has gotten me through. This blog has had a healing power. Even when it was extremely difficult to find something positive, I managed to find something to write about. As I’ve said before, the blessings keep coming, I just don’t always see the gifts I’ve been given. What really started as a challenge had turned into a tremendous blessing in itself. I had already been counting, but the idea of acknowledging the blessings publically not only held me accountable but also built up relationships with the readers that I will cherish forever. To be honest, I never really ever expected anyone to read what I wrote. I had no idea that the words I posted would have such an impact on so many. I have been moved to tears by the comments that readers have posted I am truly humbled every time someone talks to me about it in person. I’d like to say thank you to everyone who has supported this project. You pulled me through and I am eternally grateful, not only for you but for all of the blessings God has sent my way.
By the way… just because it’s not listed here… doesn’t mean it wasn’t a blessing, and that includes many, many people. I could only list 365 in this venue… but there are many more. And, I’m not going to stop counting. Please don’t be offended if I didn’t mention you or something important to you here in the blog. Please know you are loved, appreciated and prayed for.
I will be printing my blog (comments included) as a keepsake. If you are so inclined, I would love to include your comments. I won’t publish it until February 1st, so please take some time before then and comment on a post (or two, or several.) It would make it that much more meaningful.
So what’s next? It saddens me to think that this project is ending… so instead of just stopping, I’m going to just change it a bit. My New Year’s Resolution for 2010 is going to be a “Photo A Day” that will be posted on Kelli’s Personal Blog. Of course I always have something to say about everything so there will be writing too. It’s been so therapeutic for me I can’t stop now.
Thank you again… for everything. All of your prayers, words of encouragement and support. I asked for God’s continued blessings on us all for 2010.
Johnny Green
We have goofy tradition in our house for New Year’s Day. Johnny Green is a special character that delivers gifts to our house on New Year’s Eve. Similar to Santa Claus, he sneaks in and out without anyone noticing. The difference between Johnny and Santa Claus is that his gifts are pretty consistent. Traditionally, he brings calendars and/or school supplies. Occasionally, Johnny will leave behind a little something to compliment a Christmas gift that was received like accessories, extra batteries or additional components like video games for a new system. Johnny makes the gifts of Christmas even better.
The best part of Johnny Green is the fact that he is a second chance. If you didn’t get what you really wanted for Christmas, maybe Johnny Green will come through. There’s always a chance. People laugh at this tradition, but I think it’s one of my favorites. I wonder what will show up this year?
Twelve Days of Christmas
I’ve already mentioned that the period of time between Christmas and New Year’s is my favorite time of year. Actually it is the REAL Twelve Days of Christmas. WARNING: Another Catholic teaching ahead. The period of time preceding Christmas is known as Advent and is a time of preparation. Christmas (for Catholics) actually begins on December 24th with the Christmas vigil mass (Christmas means Christ’s Mass) and runs up to the Feast of the Epiphany which celebrates the arrival of the Magi. These are the 12 Days of Christmas. In reference to the song, there is symbolic meaning behind each of the gifts from the 12 days of Christmas.. Click here to read more about the meaning behind each of the gifts. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if people would celebrate Christmas for 12 straight days? It might even make all of the preparation fuss worth the effort.
Christmas Tree Lane
We’re late this year, but we usually make an annual trek through the Christmas Tree lanes in Turlock and Ceres. I figured that they would still have the decorations up through January 1st so we gave it a try. Unfortunately, we were disappointed to see several houses without lights at all, and even more that had they up, but not on. I don’t know if it’s a sign of the times, or if we really were too late to enjoy the spectacle. In Ceres, there were very few houses with any lights at all, and none were on when we drove by.
This is another one of those traditions that adds to the celebration of the season. Even though the purpose was not fulfilled we still enjoyed the blessing of the drive and being together. As we drove around we admired all of the lovely houses that were adorned for the season. We commented on what we liked and what we didn’t. Then we started just admiring and critiquing the houses in general. It all goes back to the phrase “Life is a journey, not a destination.”
Reclaimed Home
As much as I love the holidays… there is nothing quite like the feeling of restoring my home to it’s normal state by putting all of the “Christmas crap” back in the boxes and cleaning up. It is my favorite day of the entire year. I know this sounds harsh, but I think all of the added “stuff” that surrounds us with the holidays adds to the stress of the season… at least I know it does for me. There is such peace with having it all put away. Clutter really does make a difference with my attitude and state of mind.
This usually takes place on December 26th (which, by the way is Boxing Day in Canada… I always thought that was appropriate) but this year we delayed it for the Faulkner Family Fun Fest yesterday.
A special thank you to Leroy for bringing in the boxes and dis-assembling the tree, Jared (Sierra’s boyfriend) for putting all of the villages back in the proper spaces and to Sierra for assisting, supervising, and restoring the normal decor to it’s proper place.
It truly is the most wonderful time of the year.
Faulkner Family Fun Fest
Well… it’s a good thing that I relaxed yesterday, because today was total CHAOS! Today was the annual gathering of my side of the family… The Faulkner Family Fun Fest. We started hosting the FFFF about 10 years ago. (Cant’ remember the first one…) I was tired of feeling sad because I did not see my family on a regular basis so we decided… maybe… if we host it, they will come… and come they did. It took a few years to take hold, but now it is a family tradition that is not to be missed.
They come and go in a rush… We start at 11 and I can not remember a time when anyone was left over past 4:00 pm. Today’s event was 3 1/2 hours of chaos. Too many people all crammed into the kitchen, cooking, eating and visiting. There are lots of little kids running around now (grand nieces and nephews) and the spouses and significant others add to the numbers every year.
There are lots of traditions surrounding this event too… i.e. the Slide show, Uncle Glade’s milk, yelling at Chuck to come out for the picture, and Leroy taking off about 1:00 to go out to work. Jon insists on being the first one to leave. He announces his departure as soon as he walks through the door, but this year he was dead last. (lol.)
I have to admit, I love this motley crew. They all complain, piss and moan but I’ve been around long enough to know that’s how they show their appreciation. They keep showing up year after year so we must be doing something right.
Peace
I made a very deliberate decision not to do anything extra today. I just want to be in the moment. Of course there is still lots of necessary things to do when it’s Christmas and you have a house full of people… but I did not do anything beyond necessary. I didn’t check my email, I didn’t Twitter and I didn’t post anything on Facebook. I didn’t cook more than necessary, I didn’t clean the toilets and I didn’t mop the floor. I didn’t pay bills or check my balance online.
I napped on the couch in my new Snuggie as “It’s a Wonderful Life” played on the TV. I sat and enjoyed a cocktail with Leroy and a dear friend who stopped in to share Christmas joy. We spoke of the future with optimism and a positive attitude. I hid a away in my room and read a few chapters of the book I’ve been working on and I went to bed early. It really was a day filled with peace and joy, just as it should be.
Christmas Eve
I’ve written several times about the traditions we have and how I’ve come to realize how important they are to me. Christmas Eve is a biggie… We have a pretty “set in stone” schedule that we adhere to and today is no exception. I have to be honest and state here that I’ve been dreading the holidays this year only because of our employment changes and the economic stresses that we are currently undergoing. We set ourselves up for failure when we overemphasize the importance of the material part of the holiday. It’s really not what matters.
We talk about making it to mass early enough to get a seat… Hurrying home to be the first ones to arrive at John and Doralice’s for dinner… Eating too many appetizers and not having enough room for the real meal… Sitting around watching the annual slide show… Making fun of Anne and her presents…. Arguing over the pose for the annual Christmas photo… These are the moments that we depend on… the moments that make Christmas a special family gathering. These are the things we’ll remember.
We had a great time. It’s difficult to feel sorry for yourself when you look around and truly take stock. Everyone we love was there just as they have been the years before. The dinner table was overflowing with delicious food and there was more than enough for everyone to eat their fill (and most of us overate.) Everyone at the table is in good health and not facing a life threatening illness. Every adult who needs to be employed, has a job. Everyone has a roof over their head and a bed to sleep in. There was a gift for everyone in attendance. The children were appreciative and the love was sincere. What more could we ask for?
Impromptu Parties
We received an invitation today to a “spur of the moment” Christmas party. This family felt like they just weren’t in the Christmas spirit yet, so they invited several friends to stop in for a drink tonight. They live very close to the church and we were going to confession so we made the plan to go. I teased the hostess that it didn’t make much sense to go straight to confession to her house and she readily agreed.
It was great to see old friends for a quick, stress free visit. We only stayed about an hour, but it did lift our holiday spirits. Friends and family are what the holidays are all about. So many times we put so much work into something, by the time we pull it off, it hardly seems worth it. Keeping focused on what’s really important is what makes the season bright.
Christmas Shopping
I don’t do much of it, but I have to admit, the few times I do venture out this time of year to pick up a few things can be kind of fun. The secret is in the timing. All (or most) of the stores open quite early this time of year so I go early before the crowds. I particularly love how the stores are decorated… but I noticed today that even most of the shoppers are decorated too. I saw several festive, holiday sweaters and lapel pins depicting scenes of the season and I had to smile. Even with all of the added stress and chaos, people in general do try harder to be a little more kind to strangers… and that’s always a good thing.
